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Posted by on Jul 5, 2015 in News | 0 comments

The Consequences Of Not Following Instructions

Directions

Not following instructions can lead to bad tans, or worse, unwanted pregnancy.

All our lives we are told to follow instructions. “Cross at the green and not in between.” “Never eat yellow snow.” “Don’t talk to strangers.” So there are common sense instructions and then there are instructions that we like to test. What happens if I follow A,D and F but not B,C and E. Oh children, I will tell you what happens with just a few short examples.

Jolen Face Bleach. Way back when before many of you were born, I decided that this product would serve me much better if I put this product on the hair on my head. Boys and girls do not try this at home unless you are ok with orange hair. And not the cool “Orange is the new Black” orange, I am speaking of a very bad shade of orange, the kind that oxidizes in the sun and becomes even scarier. Stick to the instruction on this one.

KY personal care products. This product is designed to help make your sex life more pleasurable. Looking back, it did tell me to test the product on my hand before testing it on my hoochie-mama. Nope, didn’t listen and my poor hoochie-mama felt like it was going to burn off and disintegrate, that was not pleasurable for me at all. As for my partner, the screams of pain caused him to lose some of his hearing. Also, not so pleasurable.

HILARIOUS ADAM AND EVE PARODY

Spermicide. Ladies, when the directions tell you not to take a shower, listen to them. How do I know? Allow me to introduce you to my 17 year old son who is only 15 months younger than his brother. READ AND FOLLOW THE DIRECTIONS!!! Unless, of course, you want to trick your partner into having another baby and then it’s on you, because I did warn you!

Sometimes, you have to follow instructions, even if you don’t want to because they are there for a reason! And sometimes, I guess, you have to just go with your gut and hope that no one gets hurt and nothing falls off…

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