The Top 5 New Millennium Bushes
This list of the top millennium bushes will change your definition of a sexy bush.
Vaginas in the 21st century are much like American politics after 2008. We just got tired of the bush! Yet, unlike George Bush, I really wouldn’t mind seeing pubic hair make a comeback. It’s soft and downy, and it makes sex feel like a treasure hunt. There were days, not long since past, that one had no idea what sort of magical pubic topiary gardens rested under those panties until the deed was underway. It was a mystery, like opening boxes on Christmas morning! You would find the landing strip, the triangle, sometimes it looked like she had that guy from LMFAO in a scissors lock, and you had to bushwhack your way in like Dr. Livingston. Nowadays you usually have the choice of bald or bald. Not to demean the shaven twat, but it gets enough attention. We need to recognize the natural beauty of the genital fuzz. So without further ado, Filthy Gorgeous presents the top five new millennium bushes.
Stoya once tweeted on the merits of pubes saying, “If you think pubic hair on a woman is unnatural or weird, you aren’t mature enough to be touching vaginas.” Although she is often shaven in her line of work, this porn starlet chooses to sport a full and proud pubic tuft in her free time. It is a jet black landing strip of ecstasy. Want to experience the Stoya sensation? Use her fleshlight!
4. Selma Sins
Selma Sims‘s well coiffed coochie is like an oasis of long flowing fluff in this world of follicle-challenged muff. It looks like a soft, wispy cloud, and you just want to make it rain! For lack of a better word, she has adorable pubes. I didn’t know pubes could be cute, but she has a cute little bush. I’m talking Thumper from Bambi cute.
The Bigger The Bush, The Better The Woman
3. Sasha Grey
Audiences were shocked by Sasha Grey’s infamous nude scene in HBO’s Entourage, where the veteran porn star, usually waxed to maximum smoothness, rocked a full on 70′s muff! It wasn’t unruly or out of control, but perfectly trimmed and sleek. Although she was criticized for her natural look, in this writer’s opinion, she proved that bush is beautiful.
2. Kate Middleton
Bored with the vaginal fuzz of the American porn star? How about the opulent, fur lined vagine of royalty? The Duchess of Windsor just can’t seem to shake those paparazzi. Scandalous bottomless photos reveal that the royal coochie dresses for an English Summer. The future king has been tested in the battlefields of Afghanistan, but apparently he likes to take an occasional romp through the jungle as well!
1. Cameron Diaz
In her homage to positive body image, The Body Book, Ms. Diaz espoused the merits of a hirsute undercarriage. She cited the effects of gravity on the labia, adding “Do you really want a hairless vagina for the rest of your life?” Cameron isn’t the only major celebrity known to defend the rights of women to let their pubes flow in the breeze. She is joined by the likes of Gwyneth Paltrow, Kate Winslet, and Lady Gaga!